Kids Say The Darnest Things

Promise: Why are you sad Auntie Mich?
Mich: Because my boyfriend left already and went back to his country.
Promise: Don't worry Auntie Mich, he'll come back for you.

This conversation happened a year ago when Promise, my adorable niece, was only 3 years old. Imagine a kid saying this to me! I mean, what does she know about love and relationships, right? But there I was thinking that he's never coming back (he never did come back, by the way! hehe) while this kid was so full of hope and promise. No wonder her mom named her Promise!

Mich: (talking to my cousin, Promise's dad) Kuya John, did you hear what she just said? Isn't she the sweetest, most adorable kid in the world?
John: You're not actually gonna believe a three-year old?!

Well, Promise didn't cheer me up by what she said but by reminding me that it's all about perspective. That's how kids see things--always optimistic, always looking on the bright side, always hopeful. Sometimes it doesn't hurt to look at things the way kids do. Kids never suffer from hyperstension only adults do!

Then a couple of months ago, after Promise turned four, we had another "conversation".

Promise: Auntie Mich, do you have a husband?
Mich: Noooo. (Imagine my shock because she asked this out of nowhere!)
Promise: How come you don't have a husband?
Mich: Because I don't have a boyfriend yet. I need to have a boyfriend first so that someone will ask me to marry him.
Promise: Okay. I'll ask Jesus to give you a husband.
Mich: (talking to Promise's mom) Ate Oonee!!! Why is she asking me this??? Seriously!
Oonee: Maybe because most of the adults she knows are married, like me, Lola Amie (my mom), Auntie Res. She must've assumed that all women have husbands.

Hahaha! I couldn't stop laughing! I swear this kid is too smart for her age!

But wait! There's more! Promise isn't the only kid "pressuring" me into getting married. My college friend's five-year old kid, Choco, who happens to be my god daughter started asking me questions like that early this year and every time she sees me or talks to me she would ask the same questions.

(I visited Choco early this year with a guy that I was dating that time)
Choco: Ninang Mich, is he your husband?
Mich: Noooo. (I can feel my cheeks turning red with embarassment! I couldn't bear to look at him! We've only gone out on a couple of dates!)
Choco: When are you getting married? I want to be your flower girl.
Mich: Hey! Let's play with the doll I gave you!

I just had to change the subject! What was I supposed to say?! I wasn't even sure if I liked the guy! I was only dating him to get over this guy I dated before him! He was just the rebound guy so marriage was definitely out of the question!

Until this day, everytime she hears her mom and I talk about some guy I'm dating she would ask me if she can be the flower girl on my wedding. Even these kids are pressuring me into marrying soon! Have they been talking to my mom?!

Apparently, Choco always assumes that whenever a girl has a boyfriend she's supposed to marry that guy. I used to think that way when I was still an idealistic, wide-eyed 14-year old. But, after 12 years, 2 serious boyfriends and 8 pseudo boyfriends/jerks I have learned that life doesn't happen that way.

Kids, sorry to burst your bubble, but 99% of the time your first boyfriend would not be the same man you will spend the rest of your life with. Most of us will have to suffer through bad dates, go out with a few jerks, suffer more bad break ups and heartaches, cry our eyes out at night and kiss a couple more frogs before we meet our prince.

Some of us will even have to wait a long time. As Charlotte said in Sex and the City, "I've been dating since I was 14! Where is HE???!" But, remember that good things come to those who wait. We may have to go through all these unpleasant things to make us stronger, to build our character (to teach me patience) and to teach us lifelong lessons that we will need along the way.

And no, he will not rescue you like some knight in shining armor. He's not like the perfect prince of a Disney Princess. He's not even like Ken, Barbie's boyfriend. And no, he's not even like Patrick Dempsey or Justin Timberlake (I wish!). He's just an ordinary man, with flaws and imperfections just like everyone else outside the fairytales and Hollywood movies. But he is someone made especially just for you. You will love him just as he is and he will love you just as you are.

So, to answer your question girls, don't worry about Auntie/Ninang Mich. If it is God's will for me to marry, MY prince will find me one day. Promise, if you keep praying then maybe Jesus will answer your prayer and He will give me a husband. And Choco, when that day comes I hope to God that you're still young enough to be my flower girl!