"I think I want to break up with my girlfriend." My friend casually announced.
We were eating vanilla sundaes last night when he started telling me about his dilemma. He asked me how he's going to tell his girlfriend that he doesn't want to be with her anymore. He's worried that he'll hurt her (Duh!). The girl just lost her job because of the current global financial crisis. He doesn't want to drop another bomb in her life right now.
"I thought things were going great with you guys? Aren't you just about to celebrate your 6th month together? What happened?" I asked.
"Ayoko na. Cold na ko sa kanya ngayon eh. Naaawa na lang ako sa kanya kaya hindi ko pa magawang makipag-break." (I don't want her anymore. I don't feel the same way. The only reason why I still haven't broken up with her is because I feel sorry for her) He replied.
Girls, you should understand the we are not the only gender who double-talks. Guys do that too. A lot! And if you don't want to be that jerk's next conquest then I suggest that you learn how to decode what a guy is saying. Because what he says is actually different from what he really means.
What my egotistical friend (I don't even know why I still hang out with him) is actually saying is this: "I already got what I want from her and she is no use to me now. I want to move on to the next unsuspecting female victim. In the meantime, while I'm still on the prowl I'll keep her around in case I want a booty call."
Then he proceeds with telling me the conversation he had with one of his male buddies and the advice he received.
"Dude, just tell her that you're really busy right now. Or tell her that you have things to settle or fix in your life and you can't be in a relationship while you're doing that." Was his friend's very wise advice.
Uhmmm... how about telling the truth you pathetic gutless coward?! I mean, seriously! Why do guys have to lie? We at least deserve to hear the truth and not some lame excuse, right? It's like my parents telling me when I was 7 that my dog didn't actually die, she was just sent to doggie heaven for good behavior.
"Why do you have to lie to her? Why can't you just tell her the truth?" I asked my friend idignantly. I've heard that same crappy excuse from some loser I recently dated and I can't believe that I'm hearing it straight from another guy's mouth. Guys really say things like that just to get out of a relationship!
"Because I don't want to be the bad guy. She was sacked from her job and then gets dump three days after? That'd would be horrible for anyone!" He explained. (Poor girl. She has no idea about what's to come.)
What he actually means is this: "I somewhat care if she would get hurt but mostly I just want to look like I'm the real victim here. I want her to think that it's not her fault but entirely mine instead. You know, in case word comes out at least girls would think that I'm the one always getting dumped and not the one doing all the ditching. That way they wouldn't think that I'm a real jerk."
It's not you, it's me... right boys?
aheks...syempre kahit papano dapat meron graceful exit.... pero malay natin ayaw nya talaga makasakit...knowing na nawalan pa ng trabaho si Iha...boy, makonsenya ka naman...
ReplyDeletepero minsan tama din na hindi itago ang katotohanan...sabihin na ang sasabihin, ipunto na ang dapat ipunto, masaktan na ang masaktan....unfair din kasi yun sa babae...
yeah, supergulaman is right.. she deserves to know the truth no matter how painful it is to accept.. ganun tlga eh, truth really hurts.. in either way, masasaktan at masasaktan nia ung girlfriend nia..
ReplyDeleteI think it better to end up they're relationship asap.. wag na xa gumawa ng kahit na anung excuses.. much better kung magsabi na xa ng totoo.. hehehehe..
;)
mich, your title reminds me of the book 'men are from mars, women are from venus'.. two different individuals with different worlds. duh.. confusing.. :)
ReplyDelete(Mali talga si parekoy na itrato ang mga babae na ganun lang. Pero hindi ito ang gusto ko bigyan ng punto. Pipilitin ko mag ingles... Pakihanda ang mop para sa dugo.. hehe...)
ReplyDeleteDamned if you do, Damned if you don't!
It's not like I'm trying to defend my gender here, or even to start a gender supremacy debate, but you know it's not that simple as just telling the truth. Talk about timing, readiness and a pleothra of other things, but really it's going to hurt like hell either way.
And some girls do the same thing when dumping boys. It's just that some girls think that they deserve or demand special treatment from guys. They can hurt the guy but the guy must be able to take it. The guy can't hurt the girl but the girl can do so anytime she wants. It's just crazy!
Some people are so darn impatient in knowing the truth. But unfortunately some people cannot handle the truth. Telling a lie is different from suppressing the truth. The question really falls on how we are ready to know, hear and accept the truth.
This is beginning to start as a post so i better cut it short. But let me close it with a song...
"There's no easy way to break somebody's heart"
(Hinga malalim) Ingats! =)
@ superG
ReplyDeleteexactly! kausapin mo nga ung friend ko superG.. he needs some mature male advice not the ones he's getting from his equally immature friends! haha!
@aisa
men like that are cowards that's why they make up lame excuses... sinabi ko na rin sa kanya yang sinabi mo i just hope he listens to me and not to his jackass friend. hehe...=)
@fly
Say whut? kahit ako na-confuse sa sinabi mo! hahaha! ;)
@Oracle
ReplyDeletewow! galing mo naman pala magenglish eh! and thank u so much for responding in that language 'cause it makes it so much easier for me to read! hehe..
ur comment truned out to be a good material for a post so therefore I think I just might quote you on that on my next blog and u can read my response to what u said on that... that is if you don't mind?
thanks! ;)
by all means michy.... =)
ReplyDeleteteka ha.. d2 pako red cross. kailangan ko ng blood transfusion. lolz... tc
hahaha! that's funny! ako din na-nosebleed sa "plethora" mo... i even looked up what it means---in excess or abundance-- such hyphaluting word! san mo naman hinugot yan oracle? hehe...=D
ReplyDeleteat some point tama ung decision nung guy na wag sabayan ung problema nung girl sa work. but maling mali naman ung trato nya. girls should be treasured not be treated that way.
ReplyDelete"the truth shall set you free"
though it may hurt, the pain will just make her stronger. but nasa girl na din yun how she will take the news. it should make her stronger not destroy her.
@lownous
ReplyDeletevery well said! i said the same thing about truth in my new post.
i hope there are more guys in this world who looks at women as treasures and not merely just objects...